If you have been following this project you may recognize some of the origami pieces featured in this little compilation. Today I saw this box of folded paper that I have used off and on for the last few months and thought that I should see if I could put it together in an interesting manner.
There are elements in here that I used in other photos but mixed up with ones that I used for completely different reasons, as I look at it I think of a lot of different things. I think about some of the people that were the impetus behind starting this in the first place. I see some things that I put in them that no one but me would really understand, though if you look back through the older pictures you might come up with your own meaning for them.
I thought that this was interesting to look at originally, which is why I selected it. But I continue to look at it and I see new and different things that I didn’t notice the first time. I make different associations when I look more closely at some parts. I know it seems busy and random, and it is. I sometimes like things like this that you can look at more than once and see something new in each time. It might make a good puzzle.
In a lot of ways this is how I feel about this project sometimes. I started it with some ideas of what it would look like. As I have struggled to find ideas or fought against the idea of just writing about cancer and how much it really sucks, I have seen my motivation ebb and flow. I have felt inadequate like I just wasn’t doing this project justice. And every once in a while I look back on the pictures and some of them just make me smile, or remember something sad or remind me of someone I’ve lost. It’s times like those that even though I don’t love all the pictures and some days I just feel like I have to put up something, anything really, that it’s been worth it.
I still have a long way to go, and hopefully I will be able to put together some pictures that are really great. But cancer still sucks and that’s why I started this in the first place.